


Someone in the crowd

by dahyunayeon



Category: TWICE (Band)
Genre: F/F, Inspired by La La Land (2016), dont be fooled by my weak summary, it's not the same exact plot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-09
Updated: 2020-08-09
Packaged: 2021-03-05 23:16:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,096
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25803490
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dahyunayeon/pseuds/dahyunayeon
Summary: Nayeon and Sana meet more times than they should. It doesn't mean anything, though, there's nothing going on between them and it probably never will. Then, they fall in love.sanayeon la la land au!
Relationships: Im Nayeon/Minatozaki Sana
Comments: 7
Kudos: 101





	Someone in the crowd

**Author's Note:**

> HAPPY BIRTHDAY SAM!!!!!!! i really really hope you like this and know you're the best girl ever!!

**winter**

Sana draws a sad face on the misty bathroom mirror, making the glass squeak. Little water drops dribble down her shoulders and legs. Sana sighs and wipes the mirror with her coffee-stained shirt, then tosses it aside. The door of the bathroom opens abruptly and Chaeyoung walks in, unbothered by Sana’s undressed state as she heads towards the cabinets to look for her makeup. Sana holds the towel around her torso tighter to her chest and moves to pick up her clothes from the closed toilet lid. 

“What are you gonna wear tonight?” Chaeyoung asks her with her mouth comically open as she tries to apply her eyeliner straight. 

Sana scoffs and pulls a shirt over her head. “I’m not going.”

“Yes you are,” Chaeyoung scoffs back. She grabs Sana by her shoulders and shakes her slightly. “When else are you gonna get to hang out with all those Hollywood snobs? Maybe you’ll even find the right snob to give you that push you need.” 

Sana holds Chaeyoung’s wrists and moves her hands away with a sad smile. “I don’t want to ruin the mood. I would rather be miserable at home, but thanks.” Sana walks towards her room, but she hears her roommate trailing behind her. She doesn’t turn to look at her, she just plops down on her bed and waits for Chaeyoung’s weight on top of her tiny mattress. 

“Do you wanna cry it out?” Chaeyoung rubs Sana’s back and Sana mumbles some unintelligible words against her pillow. “I understand.” Chaeyoung nods and hums, managing to get a laugh from Sana. “Come on, this isn’t the first failed audition and, I’m sorry, but it might not be the last either.”

Sana pouts, trying to play off how much Chaeyoung’s brazen words hurt. “Today was terrible, Chaeng. I got coffee spilled on me, and it was  _ hot. _ The audition wasn’t just bad, it was devastating. I thought it was going well but they cut it short because they wanted to order  _ sandwiches.  _ And some asshole honked at me on the road.” Sana concludes with a whine. 

“Then let's end it on a good note.” Chaeyoung tickles Sana’s side playfully. “You never know what could happen. Maybe that encounter you’ve been waiting for will happen tonight.” Chaeyoung wiggles her eyebrows, Sana rolls her eyes. 

“Alright, alright, I’ll go.”

“Yes!” Chaeyoung jumps to her feet and starts going through Sana’s closet. She throws work shirts and coats out of the way, and then grabs the two dresses hanging at the back. “This one is your mother’s I’m sure,” she discards a green dress with a disgusted face, “And this is Tzuyu’s,” Chaeyoung laughs, holding the blue dress up to see how it would look on Sana.

“She never asked for it back.” Sana shrugs.

“Then she won’t mind,” Chaeyoung hands it to her and then lifts her chin, inspecting her face. “Hm, get changed so I can do your makeup.”

The party is nice. Kind of. The house is huge, with wide glass walls and a bubbly pool. There are drinks in every corner and waiters walking around with trays full of food. 

Despite being dressed up and doing her best acting to make it seem like she’s having a blast, Sana still feels like she sticks out. Everyone she tries to hold a conversation with ends up excusing themselves and leaving her alone— some have even walked away before she could approach them. Chaeyoung disappeared a while ago, but at least she had the decency to text Sana and let her know she’d be leaving the party with some girl she had met. 

Sana decides that the mystery person she’s waiting for is not worth being so awkward and sad in a party where she doesn’t know anyone. She leaves the house, and no one notices. 

Disappointed and bitter, Sana walks to her car with her head low, kicking a pebble on the sidewalk. When she gets to the spot where she parked it, she presses her car keys, but it doesn’t beep. She presses again, and nothing. She looks up and her shoulders slump when she sees her car has been towed, and then— too late —she notices the  _ no parking  _ sign right next to where it was.

Looking up at the sky, she wonders what she did to deserve such a shitty day. But instead of cursing and kicking the sign like she wants, Sana takes a deep breath and tries to calm down (all those yoga classes she took should be useful somehow).

The street is empty, she has no money, and it’s not like she can ask someone for a ride. So, completely defeated, dragging her feet on the concrete and with her head hanging low, Sana begins to walk. 

Sana cries. She wipes her tears with the back of her hand when her vision gets too blurry, but she can’t help it. She has too much pent up frustration and, like Chaeyoung suggested earlier, crying it all out helps. When her nose gets runny, she stops on the sidewalk to grab a tissue from her purse. While blowing her nose, she notices that she stopped in front of a pretty mural of people in the cinema. She’s appreciating the painting when she hears music coming from inside the building. 

She’s never been to this bar, but the music intrigues her and, weirdly, comforts her, making her crying subdue. She feels spellbound, light on her feet as she enters the bar. 

The place is significantly warmer than the street, the lights are dimmed and the mood in general is inviting, calming. She walks through the tables trying to find the source of the music.

A single spotlight falls on a piano in the center of the room. For Sana, time seems to stop and the edges of her vision blur. 

The pianist is a woman in her mid twenties, dressed in a dazzling red dress, long brown hair flowing down her shoulders. Her fingers move rapidly over the keys and she’s rising from the bench, letting the intensity of the song lift her from her seat. Every note she plays resonates in Sana’s heart, making the actress slightly open her mouth in awe and take small unconscious steps towards her.

  
  


Nayeon slams her hand on the horn of her car, dragging the obnoxious noise for as long as she can. The traffic is finally starting to unclog after an eternity, and the idiot in front of her isn’t moving an inch. 

“Come on, fucking hell.” Nayeon scoffs and honks again. She’s been in the sun for way too long and the last thing she wants is to get a heat stroke, or worse, a bad tan. But that’s the price to pay for riding a convertible. She maneuvers the car and manages to slip into the next lane. 

Nayeon stops next to the idiot who’s holding up the traffic, a woman too busy reading to drive properly. Nayeon honks and when the woman looks at her  _ offended  _ ( _ the audacity _ ), Nayeon flips her finger at her before driving away with speed. 

Despite the blazing sun, Nayeon still makes her usual stop at a café where she orders a peach milkshake. She sits on the terrace of the shop, overlooking an old, colorful building. Nayeon bites her straw as she looks at it— what once used to be her favorite jazz bar, the Van Beek, turned into a samba-tapas place. Disgraceful. 

She doesn’t feel any less bitter when she gets to her apartment, crammed with unopened boxes and things she picks up from the Van Beek dumpster— she can’t believe they dared throw away such relics. 

Nayeon makes space on her kitchen table and sits down with a little pocket notebook. She writes down the money she spent during the day and frowns when she realizes how much money she has left. She takes out crumpled bills from her pocket, and adds the sum of twenty dollars to her list. Buying the Van Beek looks less and less probable with each passing day, but Nayeon remains hopeful.

Her day doesn’t get any better when, at her job, she has to play somber christmas tunes again. As a musician, having to play mere background music is humiliating, but she’s already on thin ice and can’t afford to lose the gig, so she bows her head and does as told. At least the clients don’t seem to give a crap about the music, and maybe Nayeon will be able to return home with her ego intact. Maybe. 

She sets the tips jar on top of the piano and throws in a couple of bills, then sits down on the piano bench and stretches her shoulders. Christmas songs or not, Nayeon tries her best to be professional. Her boss glares at her from across the room, but she gives them a tight lipped smile and begins to play.

She endures the first song, and then the second. For the third one, she begins to roll her eyes. The tip jar is still mostly empty. It’s the fourth song, and Nayeon can’t suppress a yawn. When she finishes, she looks around the room, swarmed with bored faces she can’t blame. Her boss isn’t around, and the clients surely won’t mind…

Nayeon presses keys tentatively, soft sounds that soon merge together and form a lovely melody. Nayeon lets go, fingers skirting along the keys with practiced ease. The music starts slow, but it quickly builds up, becoming faster and louder. Nayeon stands up, all of her attention is on the piano in front of her. 

She finishes the song and breaks out of her trance. She lifts her gaze and immediately locks eyes with a woman standing near the bar. Nayeon’s chest rises up and down, agitated. The woman looks at her strangely, head tilted and eyes full of curiosity. Nayeon fixes her hair and breaks their eye contact. She steps down from the small stage and runs straight into her boss. They look tired and have their arms crossed over their chest. 

“What Christmas song was that, Im?” 

“Did you like it?” Nayeon asks with a smile, hoping to charm her way out of it. It doesn’t work.

“No, I did not. You clearly can’t follow simple rules, so I’m gonna ask you to go.”

“Please don’t do this,” Nayeon pleads, trying to grab her boss by their sleeve, but they step back. “It’s Christmas.”

“Should’ve thought about that before your little improv show. Now leave my restaurant, Im.”

Nayeon’s jaw clenches and she rolls her eyes. Whatever, it was a shitty gig anyway. She grabs the money from the jar and begins walking to the exit. The woman is still standing there, and when she sees Nayeon, she approaches her. 

“I just heard you play, and I wanted to-” Nayeon walks past her, bumping their shoulders together. She doesn’t stop to apologize nor hear what the woman had to say. 

Nayeon feels bad for being rude, but she feels worse about herself, and she’ll be damned if she lets anyone know how hurt she feels. 

**spring**

Nayeon fakes a smile as she plays the keyboard. Not only is she playing a song that makes her skin crawl, but she also had to dress like a clown with neon yellow pants and a red leather jacket, her hair up in a high ponytail. She tells herself that it’s good money and it was a one time thing as to not get behind on rent. 

The band finishes the song and Nayeon thinks she’s free, or at least that she’ll get a break to maybe go vomit, but the singer asks right away if anyone has any requests. 

“Girl in the front?” 

“I ran.”

Nayeon whips her head up, eyebrows furrowed and fire burning in her eyes. The woman who requested  _ that  _ smiles wickedly, or at least that’s how Nayeon sees it. She definitely knew what she was doing. Nayeon immediately recognizes her as the girl from the restaurant. She did feel bad for being rude that night, but she didn’t think Sana would hold the grudge. 

They make eye contact and Nayeon hopes she’s transmitting all the anger she feels at the moment. Sana smirks wider. 

“A fantastic suggestion. Come on Nayeon, you gotta shine with those ivorys,” The singer pats Nayeon’s shoulder, although the woman doesn’t budge, too busy glaring at Sana and counting to a thousand in her head to not burst. Sana shrugs and flutters her eyelashes teasingly. The music begins and Sana dances to the beat of the song. Nayeon tries her best to gulp down the sheer disgust.

A couple of horrifying songs later, Nayeon gets a break. She shrugs off her  _ keytar  _ and storms off to find Sana. 

Sana is inside the house, drinking a glass of cold lemonade. Nayeon stomps towards her as she unties her hair. Sana doesn’t look surprised at all to see Nayeon, she even looks entertained. 

Nayeon stops in front of her and points an accusatory finger. “Look, I remember you from that night. I know I was a little rude—” Sana rolls her eyes and Nayeon stammers. “Well, I was an asshole, I’ll admit it, but requesting  _ I ran  _ from a serious musician is just way over the line.” 

“A serious musician?” Sana scoffs, “Did you really just say that?”

“I don’t see the problem with it.”

“I’ll keep that term in mind for the next time I have to play a musician. I want to make sure it’s as serious as possible.” 

“Ah, so you’re an actress. I knew you looked familiar, have I seen you in anything?” Nayeon crosses her arms over her chest and smirks. Sana rolls her eyes and huffs. 

“It’s not like I’ve heard you on the radio, or anywhere for that matter.”

“Hm, but if I remember correctly, you  _ did  _ say I was amazing that night at the restaurant.” Nayeon says condescendingly. 

“Hm, no,” Sana matches her tone, “You actually walked past me before I could tell you how revolting your performance was.”

Nayeon gasps offended and puts her hands on her hips. “Take that back.”

“No, I don’t think I will.”

The singer of the band walks up to them and pats Nayeon’s shoulder. “Breaks over.” Nayeon watches her go with a frown, and then turns back to Sana, who’s barely stifling a laugh.

“She doesn’t tell me what to do.”

“Clearly.” 

Nayeon grabs the hair tie from her wrist and begins to tie her hair again. “What’s your name?” She asks.

“Sana.”

“Well Sana, I’ll remember you on the thank you page of my debut album. Make sure you buy a copy.” Nayeon gives her one last tight lipped smile before she leaves. With her back turned to Sana, Nayeon lets herself smile— sincerely, for once. She doesn’t know, but Sana does the same. 

Sana knew that she couldn’t go the whole party without having one annoying person talk to her. She almost did, almost, but a guy that swore he was the next big thing thought Sana wanted to talk to him and now he wouldn’t leave her alone. Sana thought it was pretty obvious she wasn’t interested by how she didn’t reply and how she kept walking trying to shake him off, but he either didn’t notice or didn’t care. 

That’s when Sana sees Nayeon walking out of the house, now changed out of her 80’s outfit into a shirt, tie and black slacks. Sana stops the guy’s rant and fakes a smile. “Goodbye, my girlfriend is over there.” She doesn’t give the guy a chance to object before she skips all the way to where Nayeon is. 

“Go along with it.” Sana whispers as she loops their arms together. Nayeon shrugs and lets Sana hold onto her. 

“If someone is bothering you should just be unfront about it and tell them to fuck off.” Nayeon tells Sana as she picks up her car keys. Sana picks hers and they walk to the street together.

“That’s too mean.” 

“It’s honest,” Nayeon argues. “Where’s your car?”

“Down the street.” Sana realizes she’s still holding onto Nayeon, so she lets go as if the other woman burned. Nayeon chuckles but doesn’t say anything. 

Sana doesn’t like silence, so she makes an effort to keep the conversation going. “Isn’t weird that we keep running into each other?” 

“It is.” Nayeon says nonchalantly, barely looking at Sana. 

“Do you think it means something?”

“Nope.”

“Yeah, me neither.”

The sky is clear and full of stars, and in the horizon behind the mountains, the sky turns purple. Nayeon stops to look at the view, and Sana stops a few steps ahead, looking in the same direction. 

“This is the perfect picture of a romantic evening. I’m sure couples would love this view.” Nayeon says and puts her hands in her pockets. “What a shame it’s you and me watching it instead.” 

Sana glares at Nayeon, but Nayeon looks smug. “I don’t want you to get the wrong idea. This,” She motions between the two of them. “Could never be. You’re not the type for me.”

“I don’t know where you got that from.” Sana scoffs and quirks an eyebrow. She crosses her arms offended, “I’d never fall for you at all. There’s not even the tiniest of spark between us, so please stop being delusional.”

_ “I’m _ being delusional? Miss  _ do you think this means something _ ?” Nayeon asks in disbelief. 

“That was only a question. I’m frankly feeling nothing.”

“Hm, good to know.” Nayeon steps closer to her. “So you agree?”

“That’s right.”

They squint at each other defiantly, then, at the same time they say.

“What a waste of a lovely night.”

Sana turns around and walks away. Nayeon catches up to her and they walk side by side again. 

“I’m glad we made things clear.” Sana says, looking uninterested and keeping her eyes on the street ahead. 

“Me too.” 

Sana presses her car keys and it beeps, showing her car a few steps away. “Do you want a ride to your car?”

“Nah, it’s over there,” Nayeon points vaguely, Sana isn’t sure where. “But thanks.”

“Well, let's never meet again.”

“Sounds like a plan.” Nayeon shrugs and Sana gets into her car. 

Nayeon waits for Sana to drive away and makes sure she can’t see her anymore, before she turns around and walks back to her car, which she parked in front of the house. 

They both mean to keep the promise and never cross paths again. They don’t actively look for each other, even if sometimes they do remember their encounter and smile, it’s very brief. They made it clear that nothing would ever happen. 

But things don’t always go as one expects. 

Nayeon has had enough of the sun and put the roof in her car. Now she gets to spend hours stuck in traffic in the coziness of her air conditioned car. Nayeon cracks the bones in her cramped up shoulders as she waits for the traffic to unclog. She usually watches videos on her phone when this happens, but the battery died ten minute ago and she’s bored out of her mind. The lane next to her moves for a bit, and a new car stops right next to hers. 

She glances at it, only out of curiosity, but then she does a double take and presses her forehead against the window. 

The driver next to her is Sana. Nayeon chuckles and shakes her head when she sees her reading a script. It looks funny, seeing Sana gesticulate and move her hands around but not hear what she’s saying. 

Sana hasn’t noticed Nayeon. Nayeon wonders whether she should try to get her attention or not— after all they had a  _ pact _ . It’d be a bit embarrassing to reach out after telling her it meant nothing that they kept running into each other, and  _ insisting  _ it didn’t. 

Fuck it. Nayeon honks the car and Sana jumps inside her car, sending the papers flying over the dashboard. Holding a hand to her chest, Sana looks around bewildered, trying to find the asshole who did that. 

Somehow, Sana doesn’t seem surprised to see that the asshole was Nayeon. She tilts her head and smiles, almost like she was waiting to see her again. A few rows in front of them, the cars start moving, so Nayeon motions for Sana to follow her with her car. Sana gives her an ok sign and drives into Nayeon’s lane. 

Nayeon feels giddy when she sees Sana go along with what she said. There was the very possible chance that Sana genuinely disliked her and wanted to avoid her forever, but now Nayeon has a chance to show that there’s more behind all her sarcasm and snarky comments. She drives them to her usual café and parks near the entrance. 

Sana steps down from her car wearing a flowy purple dress and big sunglasses. The wind blows her hair and Nayeon, only for a second, stares at her like an idiot, then hurries to open the door of the shop for her.

They sit together on the rooftop under a shade, drinking the cold milkshakes Nayeon bought for them. 

“Did you land your big breakthrough role yet?” Nayeon reclines on her chair, dangerously balancing on the back legs. 

“I’m working on that,” Sana chuckles, stirring her drink with the straw. “It’s… not getting there, but I’m trying. Have you signed your big recording contract yet?”

“No, but it’s only a matter of time before they get tired of me sending faxes and have no other choice but to hire me and make me rich.”

“ Maybe I should start faxing the casting agencies.  You want to be rich?” Sana asks, hoping to keep the talk going like a ping pong ball .

“Yeah, who doesn’t?”

“I don’t.” Sana shrugs, totally sure of her words. 

“Then why do you want to be famous?”

“I grew up watching movies and they changed the way I saw the world, for the better. When things weren’t so good in real life, the movies made me have hope for better times. The characters comforted me in a way…” Sana sighs and bites her lips, then stares at Nayeon. “Sorry, you probably think it’s dumb.”

“Not at all.” Nayeon replies right away, enthralled with how passionate Sana looked when talking. 

“If I can make one kid happy, even if just for two hours, then I’ll feel like what I do has a purpose. I want little girls to look at me like I looked at those actresses and dream the same way I did.”

Nayeon rests her chin on her hand and looks at Sana with soft eyes, wondering when exactly she went from thinking of her as an annoying woman to someone so heartwarming. 

“That’s very kind of you, Sana. I’m afraid my motives are a bit more selfish.”

“Can’t say that surprises me.” Sana jokes.

Nayeon straightens up and stretches her neck to look over the railing of the terrace. “You see that blue building over there?” Nayeon points at it and Sana turns around to look at it. “Jazz history was written in that bar. And now it’s become a samba-tapas place.”

Sana looks at her quizzically and Nayeon laughs, “I know, that was my reaction too when I first saw it.”

“Do you want to buy that place?”

“Yeah, and turn it into the jazz bar it’s meant to be. I want musicians from all over the world to recognize my bar as a respectable place. Move the hearts of hundreds of people with the music that will play all night long and  flow  into the street.”

“It’s not selfish at all. You’re gonna be sharing your passion, so I’m sure you’ll succeed in captivating people.”

“If you’re not too busy with world premieres and red carpets, maybe you can come by sometime. You’ll get drinks on the house.” Nayeon winks.

“You'll only play jazz?” Sana sips from her drink and looks away.

“Of course, why?”

“I don’t really like jazz,” Sana mumbles, a guilty yet entertained look on her face. 

Nayeon gasps and puts a hand over her chest. “How dare you… that’s unacceptable. Really, I can’t let you do that to yourself.” Nayeon downs the rest of her drink and starts gathering her things.

“You’re leaving?” Sana’s voice is high pitched, she furrows her eyebrows and looks as Nayeon ties her hair up.

“Yeah, and you’re coming with me.” Nayeon grabs Sana’s wrist and pulls her up off her seat, then towards the exit. “You can’t say you don’t like jazz, that’s such a general statement, there’s many types of jazz so you can’t just say you don’t  _ like it _ .” Nayeon says in a single breath, without missing a beat despite skipping down the stairs. 

Sana giggles over how worked up she is, but it also shows how much Nayeon really loves music. It’s cute, Sana thinks, as she stares at the back of Nayeon’s head (and her cute pointy ears) as she pushes past the doors and towards their cars.

Sana has to admit she’s happy she somehow stumbled upon Nayeon. It was an unexpected and unusual encounter, one that shouldn’t have lasted past that day in the traffic, much less the night at the restaurant. But then they met again, and again, and maybe it’s the universe finally being kind to Sana and putting someone in her way that will make her days just a little brighter. 

That’s why she follows Nayeon into a bar, one that looks too old and almost abandoned on a secluded alley. Inside, it’s the complete opposite. There’s blinding blue lights swirling around and a band on the stage playing loud jazz that reverberates inside of Sana’s chest. Nayeon’s eyes shine the second they step in, and the smile on her face is one of a little kid on christmas day. Sana is slightly more enthralled by Nayeon than the show in front of her. Only slightly. 

They sit on a table near the stage and Nayeon orders drinks for them. Up close to the band, Sana can see the skilled way in which the players play their instruments, whether that be trumpets, saxophones, drums, or the one Nayeon can’t take her eyes off, the piano. Nayeon rambles about the importance of every instrument and how each player is key to a good sound, and Sana does her best to understand all she’s saying even if sometimes her voice is drowned out by the music. 

By the end of the night (which ends rather early, since Sana has an audition in the morning), Nayeon’s throat feels hoarse and her voice is rough, but she still smiles and she walks Sana to her car. 

“So, do you still dislike jazz music?” 

“Hm, I can’t really form an opinion after one night, right? I think I have to see it again.” Sana smirks, swinging on the ball of her feet. Nayeon chuckles and pulls out her phone from her pocket. 

“Alright, write down your number, and I’ll let you know next time there’s a show.”

“I never said I wanted to see it with you.” Sana feigns innocence, but Nayeon whines and Sana gives in. “Alright, alright. Here.” Sana types her number and returns the phone. 

“No take backs.”

**summer**

One date with Nayeon turns into two, three, and then four. True to her word, Nayeon takes her to the next show, and then Sana invites her to a play, which Nayeon doesn’t understand but still enjoys. Then there’s a new restaurant Nayeon wants to try, and then the day is so nice, Sana  _ has  _ to ask Nayeon to go out for ice cream with her. And so on.

Sana never knew her life could feel like a romantic, maybe even musical movie. She can’t pinpoint when Nayeon and her became so attached to each other, but it feels natural, like it was always supposed to be like that. 

Nayeon has the best date ideas, which makes Sana want to work harder when it’s (unspokenly) her turn to ask her out. Nayeon takes her to a drive-in cinema, to museums, to a real filming studio, and then, Sana’s favorite: the planetarium.

Sana doesn’t know if what they’re doing is legal, although according to the older woman it totally is, but they sneak into the planetarium at night and Nayeon turns on the star projector. While Sana is staring up in awe, Nayeon comes up behind her and loops her arms around her waist. Sana blushes, because Nayeon being so intimate, so suddenly, caught her off guard.

Nayeon hums a song as she swings them side to side, her chin resting comfortably on Sana’s shoulder. Sana puts her hands over Nayeon’s and intertwines their fingers. Sana adores being held by Nayeon.

Sana joins in on Nayeon’s humming, and with their own melody, they begin to dance. Sana turns around to face Nayeon and drape her hands over her shoulders while Nayeon gently holds her waist. The stars look beautiful reflected on Nayeon’s eyes. 

When they kiss, it’s like the music still plays, amplified in their heads and accompanied by their hearts beating in sync. Sana cups Nayeon’s cheeks to deepen the kiss and she feels the way Nayeon melts into her body. 

Nayeon drives her home like she usually does, but this time she steps out of the car. They stand together in front of the door, illuminated by the streetlights, and Nayeon takes out a small envelope with a ribbon attached. She looks bashful, which rarely happens, so Sana hurries to open it. 

A small key falls on Sana’s open palm, along with a keychain of theater masks. She clutches it and looks up at Nayeon, whose cheeks and ears are pink. Sana leans in to kiss her cheek and promises to reply by the next day.

At seven a.m, Sana texts Nayeon to come help her pack her things.

A month after they’ve moved in together, they still have some boxes lying around. Not only Sana’s, but even some of Nayeon’s. 

Sana is sitting on the floor with her back against the bed, shuffling through some old papers in hopes of emptying one more box , when Nayeon gets home from work. She got another gig in a friendlier bar where they let her play her improv pieces, and where they tip her well.  Sana has seen the girls that go there and lose it over how pretty Nayeon is— she would be jealous, but those girls tip a lot and, after all, it’s true that her girlfriend is beautiful. 

“Hi baby,” Nayeon ruffles Sana’s hair and leans down to kiss her forehead. Sana hums content and leaves the papers aside to pay attention to Nayeon. “I bought some snacks if you’re hungry.”

“Hm, I’m good, thanks.  Did you have a nice night ?” 

“ A bit more eventful than usual but still nice ,” Nayeon sits down on the bed and starts unbuttoning her shirt. “Ran into an old classmate from college, I was really surprised to see her there. And… I got an offer.” Nayeon purses her lips and shrugs like it’s no big deal.

“A job offer or…?” Sana asks teasingly, making Nayeon chuckle.

“Yeah, she wants me to be in her band. But I already declined it.” Nayeon takes her shirt and pants off and puts on her pajama tshirt, then on her sleep shorts.

“What kind of band? You won’t even think about it?” Sana tilts her head, thinking that Nayeon would really fit in a band. 

“A jazz one, they have everything settled and only need someone to fill in the pianist spot. But I don’t like my classmate, I can’t really stand her. Besides, I’m alright as I am right now.” 

“I just think you should reconsider it. You haven’t seen this woman in a while, maybe she’s different now and you end up liking the group.” Sana shrugs and gathers the papers thrown across the floor to put them away.

“I’ll think about it…” Nayeon mumbles, hating when Sana has a point. “What’d you got there?” She nods to the papers in Sana’s hands.

“Oh, I found these in a box with some books. They’re old, half written plays I wrote as a teen.” Sana tries to dismiss it, being a bit ashamed of her old writing. 

“Can I see?” Nayeon moves to sit with Sana on the floor and does her best puppy eyes. Sana sighs, immediately defeated, and hands Nayeon the script.

“Keep in mind I was like, sixteen.”

“Shush.”

Nayeon squints and leans close to the pages, getting stuck on some words due to Sana’s tiny handwriting.  Her eyebrows raise during some parts and she hums during others . When she finishes, she looks at Sana agape. 

“This is really, really good. You should polish it and finish it, it could be a hit. You can star in it, too, and bad auditions will be over.”

“Don’t be silly,” Sana grabs the papers back and puts them away, embarrassed. 

“I’m serious! It’s far better than that play we watched last month, the one with the parrot and the talking lightbulb.”

“That was… up to personal interpretation.”

“I’m serious, babe.  _ You should think about it _ .” Nayeon says in a mocking tone, repeating Sana’s words from earlier. Sana rolls her eyes and flicks Nayeon’s forehead, making her laugh louder.

“Shut up and come cuddle before I send you to the couch.”

“We haven’t assembled the couch.”

“Then you better hurry.” 

Sana thinks about it. Nayeon doesn’t.

Sana begins to rewrite the pages she had of the play, constantly texting Nayeon for her opinions and input. Nayeon encourages her although she remains honest, telling Sana when an idea seems like too much or unfitting. Sana writes fast, and in no time she already has a rough draft of the whole plot. Nayeon stays up with her on the nights she edits, and even reads out some lines when Sana wants to act it out to see how it sounds. 

Nayeon is very proud, but when Sana starts to send copies of the script to theater agencies, Nayeon can’t help but feel like she’s  falling behind . She got too comfortable with her job and stopped saving up to buy the building, instead spending the money on decorating the apartment or on dates with Sana.

From her wallet, Nayeon gets the card her old classmate, Jihyo, gave her when they met. Even if she said no in the first place, Nayeon still saved the card, just in case. Nayeon saves the number on her phone and mulls it over, only hoping it’s not too late. The money would help with her goal, and also maybe give Sana a bit more certainty that they will be able to book a few nights in a local theater. 

The next night, when she leaves the bar and heads to the car, Nayeon stares at the contact on the screen. She’ll never know unless she at least calls, so she presses the button and hopes for the best. 

When she gets home, Sana is lying in bed with a laptop in her legs. She has her glasses on and looks focused on the screen, but she still stops writing to greet Nayeon. 

Nayeon can’t quite hide her excited face, so Sana knows something is up right away.

“Remember the band I totally refused to join? Well, I may or may not be meeting up with the leader tomorrow.” Nayeon shrugs and smiles guiltily, and Sana beams at the news. She gets up from bed to hug Nayeon and give her a congratulatory kiss. 

“It’ll be good for you, I’m sure.” Sana sighs, happy, not letting go of Nayeon. 

“I hope so.”

**fall**

Sana taps her foot against the floor, leans her back on the brick wall, and hears the phone ring in her ear. She’s on her break at work, trying to reach Nayeon who is hundreds of kilometers away, in the middle of a tour that seems to never end. The last two calls (one in the morning and one three hours ago) went through, but she hopes now she’ll have luck.

After eight rings (Sana counts them) Nayeon finally picks up. 

“Hey!” Nayeon greets on the other end. There’s a lot of noise in the background and people that are trying to talk to her despite being on the phone. “Sorry, I only managed to grab my phone now and I saw the missed calls.”

“It’s okay, I figured you were busy…” Sana bites her lip, not sure what to say now that’s talking to her girlfriend. “What was it today? A photoshoot?”

“Yeah, we have some cool space concept… I don’t really get it, but people say it’s  _ what’s hot these days _ .” 

Sana chuckles and closes her eyes. She misses Nayeon, she hopes she would talk endlessly like she did when they hung out together.

“What are you up to?”

“Just taking a break from serving coffee… I get distracted thinking about the play and end up messing up.”

“Did you get the money I sent?” Nayeon sounds agitated, Sana can hear her shuffling and walking around, probably trying to find a quieter place. 

“Yes, thank you. I’m gonna go pay what’s left of the  theater rent after my shift.” Sana smiles full of excitement, all her hard work of the past few months would finally become a reality.

“Make sure to save the best seat for me.” Someone calls for Nayeon, and Sana pouts even though her girlfriend can’t see her. “Sorry babe, they need me back on set. I’ll call you tonight alright? Promise.” 

“Sure. Good luck.”

Nayeon hangs up. Sana lowers the phone and throws her head back against the wall. 

She never knew Nayeon’s band would be so successful. She was beyond happy, don’t get her wrong! But she thought Nayeon would stay in the city, or at least in the same state. But the first few concerts were a total hit, and they had a tour deal in no time. Nayeon looked happy about it, and Sana supported her in every step of the way. 

The first few weeks without Nayeon were alright, Sana managed to only miss her by an average amount. But the nights were starting to get cold, and Sana missed sleeping cuddled up to Nayeon, eating her homemade food and hearing her sing in the shower. 

Still, Sana managed to be without her. She kept herself busy with the play, making sure the scenography and lighting were perfect and putting up posters around town. 

Sana walks into the apartment, distracted reading the envelopes she picked up from the mailbox. When she notices the lights are on, she stops and looks for a possible weapon to defend herself. She heads to the kitchen with an umbrella pointing in front of her, but instead of a burglar, she finds Nayeon setting up the table. 

Nayeon stops when she sees Sana and groans. “I thought you’d be here later.”

“Should I leave?” Sana asks in disbelief, but Nayeon shakes her head and hurries to hug her. “I almost hit you with my umbrella.”

“I love you.” Nayeon sighs, holding Sana tight and shutting her eyes closed. Sana relaxes against her embrace, inhaling deeply. 

“I’m sorry if I scared you, I just really wanted to surprise you.”

“Don’t worry, I am very surprised.” Sana giggles and cups Nayeon’s cheeks to kiss her. “Is that dinner I smell?”

“Yeah, I made your favorite. You just sit here, relax, and give me a minute to take the food out of the oven.” Nayeon gives Sana wet kisses on her cheek, making her girlfriend giggle and push her away. 

Nayeon serves dinner, lights the candles on the table and pours Sana a glass of wine.

“Cheers,” Nayeon raises her glass and clinks it against Sana’s. Neither of them can stop smiling despite the exhaustion weighing on their bodies from the busy schedules. They hold hands on top of the table, even if it makes it hard to cut the beef.

Sana tells Nayeon everything about the preparation for the play and Nayeon tells her about the crazy venues she’s been to and all the photoshoots. 

“I actually met Bae Joohyun during a party, can you believe?” Nayeon fake gasps and Sana rolls her eyes. 

“I don’t see the appeal.” 

Nayeon throws her head back and laughs loudly, “Don’t be silly! Are you jealous?”

“Pff, no.”

“Come on, babe. I only saw her from afar.”

“Right.” Sana sips wine and crosses her arms, pretending to be mad because Nayeon does the cutest pout when she’s asking for forgiveness. 

They fall back into a playful mood until Sana leans in, suddenly looking serious.

“You’ve been saving up for the building, right? You haven’t mentioned it in a while.” 

“Well, yeah, I’m not saving all of my money but I’m working on it.”

“Have you gone to the building recently? They’re taking out the big sign from the front.”

“Why are you bringing this up now?” Nayeon frowns in confusion.

“Because, if you still want to buy it, you shouldn’t way much longer. Have you given up on your dream?”

“Given up on my— Sana, being on tour takes up all of my time. It’s my  _ job _ . I still want to have my own bar, yes, but right now I’m focused on something else.”

Sana huffs and casts her eyes down. “It’s hard not having you here, you know? I thought you were saving up so you could buy it and leave the band.”

“You want me to leave the band? You were the one who pushed me to join it.”

“I didn’t push you into anything, all I said was that you should think about it. I’m happy you joined and I’m elated you’re being so successful, but it seems like your goal has shifted completely.”

Their voices start rising without them meaning to.

“Is there anything wrong with that?”

“I just don’t know how much longer you’re gonna be away.”

“Sana, I’m doing this for you, for us. We have less worries ever since I started working here, we have enough for rent and for your theater—”

“I can afford the theater by myself, Nayeon.” Sana cuts in, covering her face with her hands. “Fuck the play for all I care, all I want is you, here, with me.”

“I can’t just drop out of the tour now, they need me.”

“I need you too.”

“You’re being so selfish right now,” Nayeon laughs ironically, pushing her seat back and standing up. “I  _ am  _ doing this for you Sana, can’t you see it?”

“Well you don’t have to! You should be doing things because you want to and because they’re good for you, not for me.” 

Nayeon puts her hands on her hips and paces around the kitchen. 

“You think I like being away from you? You think I don’t miss you?” 

“That’s not what I said.”

“It kills me not being with you, Sana. But this something I’m in for the long run,  _ at least  _ two more years.”

“Am I supposed to wait here for you to stop having fun, playing rockstar and going to fancy parties?”

“Wha— You know what, I can’t do this right now.” Nayeon shakes her head and walks away towards their room. Sana can still hear her from the kitchen. “I’m sorry but I’m doing my best. I’m really sorry if it’s not enough.”

Sana buries her head in her hands, alone in the kitchen with the food that has long gone cold. She sobs silently, angry tears of frustration run down her cheeks and fall on her lap. When her back begins to ache, she lays down on the couch, trying to listen if Nayeon is still awake. 

She falls asleep with her neck twisted and feeling cold, and when she wakes up in the morning, she knows she’s alone. She wasted the one night Nayeon could spend with her fighting, and now she’s back to being too busy to pick up her calls. 

Sana paces back and forth behind the curtain of the stage, fiddling with her fingers and rehearsing her lines under her breath. She doesn’t know how many people are in attendance, but it will determine if she has more shows other than the opening night. 

She hasn’t talked to Nayeon in four days. It wouldn’t be too bad if she at least had any idea how her girlfriend feels, if she’s still upset or hurt. She didn’t reply to her texts, so Sana didn’t even get the chance to apologize. 

But Sana needs to put her worries aside and be professional, even if there’s only one person in that room, she needs to give them the show she promised. 

The curtains open and Sana takes one last deep breath. The lights are blinding as she steps forward, but once she's close enough to the edge, she can see the crowd. Chaeyoung is sitting in the middle, along with Tzuyu, her girlfriend Mina and some other people Sana doesn’t know. There are some other people scattered around the room, maybe twenty in total. 

But there’s one empty seat that pains Sana the most. One right in the middle, with a sign attached to it to let everyone know it’s a reserved seat. 

Sana swallows down the anguish and gets into character, continuing with the show despite Nayeon not being there.

Across the city, Nayeon is  more nervous than she’s ever been . She’s in a fancy restaurant, wearing an expensive tailored dress and sitting between Jihyo and the drummer of the band. They were supposed to meet up with some producers earlier, but they delayed their encounter and, even though they had finished dinner long ago, they seemed to have no hurry in ending their meeting. 

Nayeon kept bouncing her leg under the table and checking her watch every thirty seconds. Nobody around her seemed to notice how uneasy she was, but if she was already late and if she didn’t leave now, she wouldn’t be able to catch the end of the play. 

“How much longer do we have here?” She whispers to Jihyo, who is fake laughing at a bad joke one of the producers just made. 

“God, I don’t know, but we need to end it soon.” 

Nayeon clears her throat and gives the men in front of her a tight smile. “Gentlemen, should we get the check?”

Sana says the final lines of the play and the curtain closes. She lets out a sharp breath, feeling her heart beating frantically. She can hear cheers from the small crowd, so she steps back out again and bows at the audience. The few people who stuck until the end seem to have enjoyed it, and Chaeyoung is  yelling  at her the loudest. 

Once she’s backstage, alone in the tiny dressing room, Sana cries. She buries her face in her arms and sobs, letting all the frustration and sadness out through her tears. She had dreamed of a big opening night, with a full house and cheers that you could hear from outside the venue. She dreamed of Nayeon, clad in her best clothes, congratulating her with a bouquet of red roses, sweeping her off her feet as they celebrated a successful show. 

But she got none of that. She feels humiliated, heartbroken as she wipes off her makeup and undoes her hair. She changes out of her costume into sweatpants and a sweater— Nayeon’s sweater. 

Nobody’s waiting for her outside of the backstage, there are no flowers and certainly no Nayeon. Sana drags her feet through the dark hallways out into the street, where the cold air serves to make her sober up a bit. 

Just then, Nayeon parks her car in front of the venue. She almost trips getting down from the car, but she runs towards Sana. 

They look like complete opposites. Sana is wearing oversized clothes, she’s barefaced and her hair runs down her back, messy and slightly hard from the hairspray. Nayeon looks like a celebrity, in her shiny dress and her high heels, not a hair out of place. 

“Sana, baby, I’m  _ so  _ sorry. Please, please forgive me. I wanted to leave ages ago but I had to wait and it became so late, please forgive me, I swear I’ll make it up to you.” Nayeon grabs Sana’s cold hands and tries to kiss her knuckles, but Sana pulls away from her.

“I need to go home.” Sana whispers, not sparing Nayeon another glance before turning around to leave. Nayeon grabs her wrist, refusing to let her go.

“I’ll drive you. Come on, let’s buy ice cream and go home and—”

“No, Nayeon. I’m going  _ home _ . I have nothing to do here anymore.”

“But the play—”

“Was a total failure.” Sana says abruptly, feeling her throat closing. “It’s useless to have more shows, no one else is gonna show up. I’d rather save myself the money and the embarrassment. And don’t worry, I’ll pay you back for booking the theater.”

“I don’t give a fuck about the money,” Nayeon whines, begining to cry. “Please, Sana. Come home with me, let’s talk.”

“I don’t have anything to say right now. Seriously, just… leave me alone.”

Nayeon lets go of Sana’s wrist and slumps her shoulders, sobs breaking out through her body. Sana gets into her car and drives away without stopping to look back. Nayeon cries inside her car, hitting her forehead against the steering wheel. 

Sana spends the night at Chaeyoung’s place, and first thing next morning, she drives back to her hometown, to her parents’ house. They don’t ask too many questions, seeing how drained and tired their daughter looks. 

Being away from the city— away from Nayeon —helps Sana clear her head. She doesn’t know what to do now, doesn’t know what path she’s supposed to take. At least her parents don’t hurry her into making a decision. 

Sana has three days of peace, of taking long walks and napping whenever she wants to, before Nayeon shows up.

She’s walking back from the store, carrying a bag of snacks when she stumbles into Nayeon, leaning against her car parked in front of her house. Sana knew it was only a matter of time before they had to talk, she couldn’t avoid Nayeon forever. 

Nayeon looks tired. It occurs to Sana that she looks the same. 

“I’m sorry,” Is the first thing that leaves Nayeon’s lips.

“Nayeon, it’s ok. It’s done, there’s nothing we can do to change the past.” 

They stand in front of each other, but the distance they keep between them feels too weird. “I quit the band.”

Sana frowns and opens her mouth, but Nayeon doesn’t let her speak. “I know what I said, about being in it for the long run. But god Sana, you were  _ so  _ right. I let myself be swayed by the money and I forgot why I was in it in the first place. It makes no sense for me to be there anymore, especially not if you’re not the one I’m coming home to.”

Sana runs a hand through her hair and avoids looking at Nayeon. Instead, she looks at the floor, at her shuffling feet standing on the concrete. “How did you even find me here?”

“I honked outside of Chaeyoung’s house until she gave me the address.” Seeing that Sana is dodging the unspoken question between them, Nayeon takes a step closer and grabs her free hand. Sana lets her hold it. “Please come home.”

A beat of silence that weighs on Nayeon, then, “I don’t know where home is anymore, Yeon. I’m sorry.”

Tears fall from Sana’s eyes and Nayeon hurries to hug her. Sana drops the bag and wraps her arms around Nayeon’s back, sobbing into her shoulder. 

“I love you, Nayeon, you have no idea how much.”

“Then come with me, please.” Nayeon begs, crying as well. She shuts her eyes when she feels Sana shake her head.

“I can’t be with you right now,” Sana whispers, breaking her own heart. “I need to be alone and figure out what I do next. I’m tired of failed auditions and serving coffee to shitty customers. And you need to figure yourself out, too. I can’t stand in the way of what you choose to do next.”

“What do I even do without you?” Nayeon cries, roughly wiping her cheeks. Sana lets out a wet chuckle, although it’s devoid of humor. 

“You’ll be fine without me… you’ll be fine wherever you go. Because you’re great at what you do and people see that.”

They break the hug and Sana cups Nayeon’s red cheeks. “Maybe the universe will grant us one more chance, when it’s alright for us to meet again.”

“We might have exceeded our coincidence meeting quota.” Nayeon smiles sadly, leaning into Sana’s touch.

“I love you. And I can promise you, I always will.”

“I’ll always love you.” Nayeon repeats, placing her hand on Sana’s chest and hearing her heartbeat. “I promise.”

“Please understand…”

“I’ll do my best,” Nayeon nods, painfully detaching herself from Sana’s hold. If she wants to be alone, that’s the least Nayeon can do for her. “Don’t be a stranger when we meet again.”

No  _ ifs. When _ . 

Sana kisses her, it’s short and wet with tears, and it makes Nayeon’s heart ache.

Nayeon gets in her car and looks at Sana through the window. No goodbyes, because that would make it seem like the end. Nayeon gets a good look at Sana before driving away, tears blurring her vision.

**winter**

**five years later**

Sana pushes a rack full of costumes across the stage, the wheels bumping over the worn out wood. Some kids linger by the seats, chatting and running around while they wait for their parents to pick them up. 

After moving back home and taking a gap year to wallow in the misery of her failed play, Sana decided to give acting a second chance, only from a different approach. She went back to the city, enrolled in community college classes, and now here she is, teaching an acting class for kids and teens in the local theater.

And to be honest, Sana is happy. She didn’t get all the glam and fame she dreamed of, but she still got to achieve her main goal: to share her love and passion for acting with young kids, and who knows, they might get the chance Sana never did.

Once everyone leaves and the stage has been tidied up, Sana leaves as well. She heads straight home, planning on taking a relaxing bath, a nap, and then finishing some assignments she’s fallen behind in. A pretty regular routine for her. And again, Sana is okay with it. Sure, sometimes she might feel something— someone —is missing, but it’s okay. 

Sana’s nap is rudely interrupted by her phone ringing. She reaches for it with half an eye open and picks up the call. She curses under her breath when she hears her coworker's voice asking if she can go by the theater that night to help set up the stage for some band that’s gonna play. Sana agrees, only wanting to go back to sleep. 

She wakes up again, a few hours later, and spends ten minutes sitting on the edge of her bed, staring at a half empty mug of coffee she left on the nightstand. Sighing and huffing every few seconds, Sana gets changed into comfortable clothes and heads to the theater for the second time that day. 

When she enters the main room, she sees people walking around dragging light stands and scenography pieces. On the stage, the band is assembling their instruments. The coworker that called Sana is with them, talking with someone facing away from Sana. She walks towards them, and her coworker waves at her with a smile. Then, the woman she was talking to turns around.

Sana stops dead in her tracks, feeling like a bucket of cold water fell over her. 

Nayeon looks so different. Her hair is short now, cut above her shoulders, and her face looks sharper, less chubby. She seems as surprised as Sana, but she hides it a bit better. She coughs into her fist and Sana clears her throat, walking the distance between them.

“What did you need me to do, Soo?” Sana’s voice is small as she addresses her coworker, who doesn’t seem to notice the tension between the two women. 

“Ah, we were thinking of having the overhead lights strobe in certain parts of the concert, but the kid who’s controlling them doesn’t know how to do that.” 

“I’ll go talk to him.” Sana glances at Nayeon quickly and power walks away from them. Nayeon lets out a deep sigh as she watches Sana go. Nayeon thanks Sooyoung for her help and excuses herself saying she has to finish setting up her piano, when in reality she needs time to process seeing Sana again after so long. 

After Sana left her, Nayeon had a hard time getting over her. She moved out of their old apartment because everything reminded her of Sana, and she was tired of missing her all the time. Eventually— after a couple of months —Nayeon decided it was enough. She still thought about Sana from time to time, but she was tired of longing for her every waking hour. So she found something to keep her busy.

Nayeon never gave up on her real dream, being a renowned musician. She figured that the core of her objective was sharing jazz music with people from all over the world,  and if she couldn’t get the people to come listen, then she would have to bring the music to them . She printed out flyers and put them on every street post she could find, on store fronts and even on car windows when the owners weren’t around. 

And that’s how she got a new band. Jihyo’s band had been fun, but in the end, Nayeon knew that wasn’t the thing for her. This new band was far more chill, without half of the production and with barely enough budget. But it made Nayeon happy. Her bandmates, Momo, Jeongyeon, and Dahyun, were amazing and matched her vibe, so they always had a blast playing and the group was popular enough that it allowed Nayeon to not worry about money. They had been touring around the country for a year now, and this was their final show before they flew aboard for the second leg of the tour.

Sana is beautiful as ever, Nayeon thinks. No amount of time can change that. It eases her mind that Sana looks happy, young and healthy. Nayeon doesn’t resent her, she doesn’t blame Sana for leaving. She always wants the best for her, and she hopes Sana is aware of that. 

When the show begins, the room is packed and the crowd is cheering for them. Nayeon beams, the music filling her up with joy and giving her the energy she needs to perform with everything she has. 

After a couple of energetic songs, they play some ballads. A spotlight falls on Nayeon and her piano. Her chest rises and her hands tingle, but she presses the keys with security. Having played this piece a million times, she knows it by heart already, so she lifts her gaze to look into the crowd.

Her eyes instantly fall on Sana, who’s sitting next to the hallway in the front row. She doesn’t look taken aback like she had before, a small smile grazes her lips and her eyes look warm. Nayeon misses her like crazy. She keeps on playing, feeling the emotions drip from her fingertips and she stares straight into Sana’s brown eyes. 

She swears she sees her tearing up. Nayeon finishes her piece and everyone stands up to clap, including Sana. Nayeon’s chest heaves and she tries to gulp past the lump in her throat. 

Sana smiles at her, in the way that makes her cheeks chubbier and eyes look small. Nayeon can’t help but smile as well, not tearing her eyes away from Sana for even a second. 

In that short moment before the lights turn back on and a flurry of colors wash over them, they’re both absolutely sure of something. 

They’ve both kept their promise.

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading! twt is dahyunayeon


End file.
